For those of you who intentionally try to ruin somebody’s marriage or get a kick out of destroying families and household, then this article is for you. Or for those who are secretly the other woman or the side chick, then I’m definitely writing this for you because you need to understand what role you’re really playing and why it’s so important for you to break free from such an unhealthy love triangle. I want to start off by saying that it’s very easy for a man to sleep with you and not think anything else about you once he’s finished, especially if he already has a woman that he truly loves and cares about. You may be saying that if he loves her then he wouldn’t be cheating on her, which is correct. As to why some men still cheat when he loves somebody else? I cannot answer that because I’m not a man, but what I can say is that you don’t have to be the other woman that he uses whenever he wants to have sex and then get up and go back home. You deserve so much better! And it doesn’t matter how pretty and thick you are or how good that you are, but you can never take the place of a woman that a man already has. That’s a war that will never be won so why try to compete and make a fool of yourself? And if you take him from her then its only because their relationship was rocky before you came into the picture and they was on the verge of breaking up anyway, but other than that, you do not stand a chance. You will find most guys who will talk about their wives or their girlfriends to the woman they’re sleeping around with and complaining to them about how he’s not happy and telling the side chick what the wife or the girlfriend doesn’t do and revealing the areas where she’s lacking. And as a former side chick I use to listen to him and figure out ways how I could be better than his woman in order to win his heart, but it wasn’t married men that I was sleeping with, only the guys who already had girlfriends. I was hoping that he would leave her and move in with me but instead of me winning his heart, I became a fool. I found myself cooking for him home cooked meals or either buying him something from a restaurant and taking it to his job, sexing him real good whenever he wanted it, and buying myself nice fancy clothes trying to look sexy for him to impress him. But ladies none of those things meant anything because at the end of the day he went right back home to the same woman he talked about to me. You will never be the one sitting at the table with him and his family members during The 4th Of July, Thanksgiving, the Christmas holiday seasons, and it’s worse when he won’t even bother texting you to wish you a happy holidays. You’re not the ones who will get the large teddy bear, balloons, dinner, and the ring on Valentine’s Day. And if he takes you anywhere then he will do it when it’s dark outside or either take you out of town or to another area so that nobody will see him. He may even take you around some of his friends to show you off to his home boys only because you’re his trophy for that day, but afterwards a trophy goes back on the shelf where it sits to collect dust. That sounded pretty harsh but it’s time for women to grow up and face reality and stop letting men use you who already has a woman. And some of you boast proudly talking about you’re getting money or he got my nails done, or he paid my cell phone bill or my cable bill, or he paid for my lace front. Really? I could pay for those things with a McDonalds paycheck if I was working there. You’re no different than a person who eats a meal from their table and once they are finished, they take the bones and the scraps that’s left over and throw it out to the dogs. AND YOU ARE THAT DOG!!!! Tell me this, what’s thirty dollars to get your nails done? Or fifty or sixty dollars to pay your phone bill? Or a forty-five dollar boot leg lace front that you got done at one of your home girls house? Or you’re probably not getting anything because he’s too busy taking care of his family. Once again, you deserve far better. Take your time and allow God to send you somebody who’s going to love you the way that you deserve to be loved. Somebody that’s willing to marry you, build with you, put you and your children in a house and love them as if they were his own. But instead you choose to be used, and then you get upset when he sends your calls to the voicemail and don’t respond to any of your text messages when you already knew what it was from the beginning. You’re the side chick, that’s what you signed up for because you feel that you can’t do any better so bear the treatment that comes along with it. Learn to love and respect yourselves by not allowing a man to have his woman and you too. Don’t waste your time dealing with somebody like that because they’re not gonna leave. But just be the strong woman that you really are and walk away from that situation.
All I could do at that moment was to express my gratitude by thanking God for everything he had done and for allowing me to go to prison in order to save my life. To everyone who is reading my testimony I would like to say to you that nobody can repay a person back like God. Once again, I stabbed a woman and a child ( The child by accident) due to a man who was cheating on me and ended up leaving me for this woman while I was pregnant, and I ended up in prison and he eventually turned his back on me. But the Lord never forgotten about me or turned his back on me although he had to discipline me for my actions, and the man didn’t go unpunished for everything that he done to me. For the word of God says: Is this not laid up in store with me, sealed up among my treasures? Vengeance is mine, and recompense; Their foot shall slip in due time; for the day of their calamity is at hand, and the things to come hasten upon them. (Deuteronomy 32:34-35) And again: Beloved do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord. (Romans 12:19) I have been freed from prison since October 2004, and my son’s father is still in prison to this day, and has been there since 2003. Never try to repay a person for what they have done to you but instead position yourselves, stand still and see the salvation of the Lord who is with you. When the man stopped supporting me, my mom sent me money faithfully throughout my six year stay and I felt that she should’ve done it because she spent the past fourteen years not being a mother. She played a major role in me searching for love in the streets when there was no love on the streets because all that men saw was a broken and vulnerable woman that they took advantage of. I walked faithfully with the Lord behind prison walls and I never masturbated once, nor did I indulge in homosexuality. God will keep you if you want to be kept and I wanted to be kept. His glory shined through my spirit and people saw that the Lord was with me and I was given much respect. In February 2004, my days at Pulaski was over and I was shipped back to Atlanta to a work release program. (Half way house) where I spent the next eight months. I was close to my freedom and that’s when the real test begin and my weakness for a man was still there because I was in a relationship with a guy but no sex was involved. But on one particular day, I got caught hugging the guy at a bus stop that almost sent me back to prison but because I was one month away from my release date, they didn’t send me back. Then finally on October 27, 2004, I was freed and that was the most happiest time of my life and a day that I will never forget. It seem like everybody in Athens Georgia came to visit me once the word got out that I was home and after all of the celebration, the tears, and the crying, I fell three months later and relapsed. For the bible says: Therefore let him who thinks he stands take heed lest he fall…..(1 Corinthians 10:12)
Although I was only a baby in Christ and was wrestling with demons in my sleep, I learned about spiritual warfare and that by calling on the name of Jesus, demons would flee from me. I don’t remember how long I stayed at Metro State Prison but it wasn’t my permanent stay because I was shipped again, but this time I ended up in Hawkinsville Georgia at Pulaski State Prison. During the entire time when I was at Metro, the boyfriend that I fought over and nearly killed a woman for (who is also the father of my son) supported me for a period of time, and was still doing so once I made it to Pulaski but then all of a sudden he stopped. I called his house one evening because I wanted to talk to him and hear his voice only to hear the voice of another woman answering his telephone and I was devastated, and It felt like someone stabbed me in the heart. I was so hurt because all I could think about was that I was in the situation that I was in because of him. All of the cheating and lying led me to snapping and at that moment I really wanted to die and was thinking about committing suicide but I couldn’t do it because my children would never see me again, and God wanted to reveal himself to me and allowed me to get hurt so that all contact between me and this man would end for good, and it took me years to get over him. Throughout my journey at Pulaski, I witnessed the power of God like never before and saw miraculous things behind prison walls that I never revealed to anyone. I attended church services on a regular basis and read God’s word along with prayer and I started to grow spiritually in him. Then I noticed that when I slept during the nights, I started having these dreams that seemed so real and whatever I dreamed about, happened. I dreamed that a woman committed suicide in prison and a few days later it came to pass. Still being young in Christ and not fully understanding what was happening or why I was having these dreams, I went to a service one night and was approached by a prophetess and she said to me: God said that the dreams that you are having are real, and that blew my mind because I never told anybody about me having any dreams and I knew that only God had revealed that to her. Every single night I was seeing a premonition from the Lord, but I didn’t know at the time that I had a prophetic anointing on my life. One particular night I walked through my dad’s house in the spirit and saw that something was wrong with his toilet, and I called my dad the next day and asked if there was something wrong with his toilet and he told me yes and he asked me how did I know, and I told my dad that I had walked through his house last night in a dream. There were many born again believers at Pulaski so I understood why God wanted me there so that I could listen to them and learn from them as well. And because God wanted me to be delivered and set free, he sent a powerful well known woman of God into my mist who was also a pastor and an inmate there. She performed exorcism on me when we were outside on the yard one evening, and she was accompanied by another believer in Christ and there was another woman sitting beside me who was waiting her turn to be delivered as well. When the pastor begin calling out demons that was in me, she told me to cough, and when I started coughing I begin vomiting. As she was calling out different demons, I kept vomiting until they were all gone. After that she told me that God said that I needed to fully surrender to him which I didn’t understand because I had given my life to him and was filled with his spirit but when I look back over my life, I now realize that what God was saying is that I hadn’t given everything to him and didn’t allow him to deal with my weaknesses. My birthdays and holidays were the most difficult time for me being behind prison walls, and there was never a day that I did not pray and ask God to let me go home. I knew that I had done wrong but I couldn’t understand why I had to do so much time when I had never been in trouble before. I was frustrated throughout the years and would get angry a lot and was always asking God why, until he finally revealed to me why in my fifth year in prison. I was sitting in the TV room early one morning watching television and I felt this strong urge in my spirit to call home. As I continued sitting there, the urge got stronger and stronger and I perceived that it was the Lord telling me to call home. When I finally called my mother she said to me: You must’ve heard? And I said: Heard what? And then she told me that the man whom I had fought over and was in prison for (And who is the father of my second son) had stabbed his girlfriend to death and was sitting in the county jail for murder and I dropped my mouth in disbelief.